Wednesday, January 27, 2021

Dumpster Fire 2021: Predicting The Ballot

 Sometime this week, the Nominating Committee for the Rock And Roll Hall Of Fame meets, or has already met. After the clockwork of the Hall's calendar got hiccoughed by the pandemic, the changing of the guard with John Sykes coming in, not to mention the anger, resentment, and frustration toward the Hall being given the extra months to swell; it almost seems somehow even more pointless to try and predict the ballot.  The Hall almost makes a point to be deaf to the people's voice and insensate to the winds of change, something I noted in my previous entry, and predicting the ballot has earned the analogy of predicting which way the winds will blow the flames of the dumpster fire.

Nevertheless, there's still something gripping about predicting the ballot. It's almost like the thrill of a cynical gambler: to be both upset and happy to collect your winnings when something terrible happens because you knew it would. You're not surprised, but you are disappointed. Even then, you still get a kick out of doing it again next go-around.  And with that, to quote Whitesnake: here I go again on my own.  I know; I hate myself for it, too.

Starting with the obvious, we are going to see Jay-Z and the Foo Fighters nominated.  Those two names are not going to not appear on the ballot.  I also strongly suspect the pandemic will cause John Prine to receive a second nomination, courtesy of the "death fairy."  From mortality to immortality.  With both Nine Inch Nails and Depeche Mode inducted this past year, that almost seems to be stacking the deck to get Kraftwerk over the bar and into the Hall this year.  Also, a return nomination for Rufus with Chaka Khan should be coming.  So far, business as usual.

But I do think there will be some shake-up. I'm strongly hoping that the inductions of Irving Azoff and Jon Landau are their proverbial gold watches before being shown the door. Hopefully, Landau is no longer the chair and that Azoff is done flexing his muscle for his clients.  And since the big push is for more women, it's important to take note that the two biggest campaigns at present are for the Go-Go's and Tina Turner as a solo artist. And though I think Burt Bacharach and Hal David are too MOR for induction as songwriters, the current reign of Dionne Warwick as the queen of Twitter makes her a prime candidate for nomination. After our collective shock of her missing out last year, there's a strong chance that Pat Benatar will be back.  It's also a bit out of left field, but I think her social media presence and her being a shining beacon of and to humanity are just raising the chances for Dolly Parton to appear on the ballot.

Unfortunately, I also have a strong suspicion that John Sykes' vision for the future really just means attracting the patronage of the White males who are simply younger than the White males to whom the Hall has been catering over the past two decades.  In that vein, Duran Duran is probably the big name that rises to the top.  There will still be the '70s rock picks too, and a return for Thin Lizzy will fill that slot quite sufficiently.  A third consecutive nomination for Todd Rundgren is pretty conceivable, too. After the debacle of the fan vote last time, I think the Dave Matthews Band will be sitting this one out, but Soundgarden could very well reappear.  I'll finish out at fifteen names and say that No Doubt would be an interesting possibility: Gwen Stefani lends a strong female presence, their induction would add more men than women to the voting bloc thus keeping bigger change from happening, they appeal to a younger breed of White males, Gwen's presence on "The Voice" keeps her name relevant, and her appearance in the video package for Irving Azoff potentially sets her band as the whisper in the NomComm's ear from Big Shorty, should his influence not be completely vanished.

So with that, I give you fifteen names that have a good shot at being nominated.  Truthfully, I haven't put too much thought into it, as averaging 11.5 hours a day tends to turn your brain to mush.  Their names will be revealed soon.  Try to stay upwind of the dumpster.